The solicitations for Secret Six #5 promise that we're finally going to learn the mysterious identity of the crime boss known only as "Junior." That gives us a little less than three weeks to do a little Vegas-style odds-making.

SS#4 gave us a couple glimpses of the shadowy figure (click on the image to the right for a larger view). So, here's what we know.

CLUES:

(1) He's got what looks to be stitches across his face.

(2) He's strong enough to go toe-to-toe with Bane.

(3) He's got an oddly misshapen head.

(4) He travels in a potato sack and does business from a small, wooden box.

Flexy DC villains -- with or without patchwork faces -- bring up a few names to be considered. Here they are, along with the odds of their being revealed in issue #5:

Hush is a Gotham-based black-cape with a thing for sutures. Gotham seems to be playing large on the horizon of this storyline, so that lends some credability to this theory, but there's no way he's able to smack Bane around, and there's no way he's going to do any business in a box until Batman finally puts him in one for good. Furthermore, he seems to have his hands full in the Batman R.I.P. storyline (and subsequent arcs). (Odds: 500-1)

Zsasz was the head of his own intergovernmental company and had amassed a large personal fortune in addition to his family's wealth, so it's not hard to see him as a much-feared crime lord. He's another Gothamite, and he certainly fits the disfigurement requirement. He might fare well with someone in Bane's weight class -- given the element of surprise. Last seen in Batman: Cacophony a few weeks ago, he is definitely out of Arkham and at large. But the third and fourth clues make this one a longshot. (Odds: 100-1)

Copperhead is a contortionist, and he's probably in the power class to give Bane a good fight. And, since his costume covers up most of his head, he might have the oddly-shaped skull. The stitches are still a question mark, though. And he's currently playing a big role in another DC villain-themed title, Terror Titans. (Odds 75-1)

The original Rag Doll. Here's where things get interesting. He undoubtedly has the rap sheet to live up to the laundry-list-style confession from SS#4. And he's a shoo-in for the four clues we've assembled. Heck, he'd be the odd-on favorite except for the fact that he's dead.

Back in JSA Classified #5-7, in the Injustice Society arc (such a well-done story, by the way), Rag Doll buys the farm handling the Cosmic Key (and in so doing, brings Johnny Sorrow back to the material plane). (Once again, click on the image to see a larger version.) But, of course, you can't swing a dead cat in the DC universe without hitting someone who's spent some quality time in a coffin.

Heck, you can't even guarantee the cat's dead.

And, there's the odd little passage as the Cosmic Key powers up. Rag Doll insists that "It's working!" Working at what? Working at granting a whole new set of meta-abilities to an aged heel, perhaps?

Finally, given the oddness inherent in the family, as related by the younger Rag Doll throughout the Secret Six series, the whole "Junior" moniker might just be an indication of a family tree with a couple fewer branches than most. (Odds: 5-1)

And that's right where the column would have ended if I hadn't gotten caught up in reading those three JSA Classified issues. (Aside to DC... I'll take those characters any day of the week and give you guys a solid title. Just sayin'.) In JSA Classified #6, the original Rag Doll reveals the following: "I have many children. One has been using my identity. We keep our distance... Usually." Multiple children, eh? Junior...? Could this be the younger Rag Doll's brother? This has the kind of "What the" factor that Gail Simone excells at. And that's where my money is: Another Rag Doll son. (Odds: 2-1).

	0% (0)	Hush
	1% (3)	Zsasz
	0% (1)	Copperhead
	18% (33)	The original Rag Doll
	39% (71)	Another Rag Doll son
	12% (22)	Some other B- or C-lister
	26% (48)	A completely new character

The Year Without A Santa Claus is my all-time favorite Rankin-Bass Christmas special. There's just no beating the charm of the hopelessly dated plots, proudly corny character designs, and jerky stop-motion animation.

But the real reason Year Without stands apart from the pack is the Heat Miser and Snow Miser. For starters, there's the theme songs each sings. Once you hear 'em, you'll be humming the tune for the rest of the year. Need proof? Here's the Snow Miser song. (If you're at work, put some headphones on!)

But beyond the enjoyment of the TV special itself, watching Year Without lets me launching into my story about Dick Shawn. Mr. Shawn was the voice of the Snow Miser. He was an up-and-coming comedian in the 50s. He was a contemporary of Jonathon Winters and styled the same manic, zany, weird delivery.

Unfortunately, he just never had that One Major Break to catapult him to Super Stardom. The movie role that he is best remembered for is the "Hitler" character from Mel Brooks' original "The Producers" starring Gene Wilder and Zero Mostell. He was also the distraught hippie in "It' a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World."

But he toured a lot -- and his act was big on college campuses.

So, he's playing the University of California in San Diego in April 1987... He's worked his set up to a fevered pitch, launching into a bit about nuclar war... He was his manic self as he began to imagine the holocaust. Nobody would survive, he explained, except the audience in the little sheltered theater! Then he shouted, "And I would be your leader!!"

And then he fell face-first onto the stage.

The crowd erupted into thunderous applause. The house positively shook as Shawn lay on the stage, unmoving.

The applause died down... aside from a few nervous giggles... and still no motion from the comic. An audience member rushed up.

Dick Shawn, of course, was dead.

New York Post columnist Cindy Adams remembered what Shawn said about trying to find the right audiences for his brand of comedy: "I can't work places like Vegas or the Catskills where people are belching. Maybe I belong in colleges. At least if I die, I die in front of intelligent people who know what I'm talking about."

Year Without a Santa Claus airs throughout the Christmas season on ABC Family.